Back
Tuğçe YAZGAN
UGM EDUCATION SPECIALIST
COURAGE TO CHANGE...
Undeniably, "being open to experience" affects our entire decision-making system in our life journey. In every situation where we do not dare to change and step into the unknown, we experience the same cycles; we end our journey without taking risks and feeling excited. "Setting goals and taking steps towards them" makes us grow and increases the pleasure we get from life. It's all about overcoming the field of fear and taking that first step.
Birth, life, and death. Isn't it the common denominator of all of us? We differ in the genetic characteristics that come with birth, our stories that develop over time, and the choices we make; we add our unique experiences to our common denominators. Of course, we share similarities in these experiences, but our stories are unique in our choices and the price we pay for them.
THE LYMBIC SYSTEM...
We can think of every choice in our lives as an output of our brain. Stimuli from external factors first arouses an emotion in us; as a result, we make decisions and take action. The limbic system controls the responses of the body's functional organs and emotional behaviors to these factors. This system is also responsible for our emotional reactions and instinct to exist. Feeling safe, falling in love with someone, hating someone, and so on are all emotions that we think through this system by the limbic system. Many of the decisions we make during the day come from our limbic system. Furthermore, the limbic system is notable for constantly analyzing risk. Therefore, we often make decisions to minimize potential risks.
If you were in the place shown in the picture below, which path would you choose?
More than 500 people were asked this question. About 90 percent chose the left side. When analyzing why 10 percent chose the path that curves to the right, it was found that these people were interested in or had experience in mountaineering, trekking, and camping. [i]
When we analyze the image, we see that there are guiding elements. For example, the fact that the left side is brighter and more visible gives us the idea that it is less risky than the right side with its forest, mountains, and darkness. The right side contains more uncertainty. At this very moment, the limbic system performs a risk analysis and whispers to us that the bright and hilly side is safer/more comfortable based on previous experiences.
The brains of people who prefer the right side, the road leading to the hills, work in the same way. However, their limbic brains have different experiences fed by good memories than those who prefer the left side. Even though they know that it has a higher risk potential than the left, they like the less comfortable road on the right. The excitement of the unknown, their past experiences, and their positive feelings towards them manipulate the classical functioning of their brains and cause them to step out of their comfort zone.
When we evaluate the majority's choice, we see that the limbic system works by "avoiding pain and risk" and "going after the known and familiar." When making decisions, our brain chooses the path that "will make it exert the least effort instead of being forced." This allows us to create our habits and comfort zones.
COMFORT ZONE…
The phrase comfort zone was first defined by management thinker Judith Bardwick as "the behavioral state in which a person operates in a state free from anxiety, using a limited set of behaviors to maintain a constant level of performance, often without a sense of risk."[ii] In other words, our comfort zone is where we are "free from anxiety, where we are in control, where we feel safe, and where routines continue." The comfort zone is not where we feel happy or peaceful; it is simply where we are in familiar situations. Bardwick models the comfort zone with a graph:
When we leave the comfort zone of feeling comfortable and safe, the zone of fear follows as a step on the way to the zones of learning and growth. This is where we need to be brave. This is where we first come into contact with the new, where our self-confidence is relatively low, where we struggle with uncertainties, and perhaps where our anxiety is at its highest. Because our mind, which always tends to choose what is consistent and familiar, brings us unfamiliar emotions when we come into contact with the new. This increases the likelihood of experiencing anxiety and stress while our mind tries to guide us to return to the old patterns and the safe comfort zone.
LEARNING SPACE...
When we manage to get out of the space of fear, we encounter the space of learning. We pursue new opportunities, we learn new things, and so we begin to create a new comfort zone by making these new things familiar to our minds. However, stereotypical behaviors that have been repeated for years are not created in a day, nor are they erased in a day. When we step out of our comfort zone, our mind tries to stop us, and stress increases as it signals that we are in unfamiliar territory. Therefore, being consistent and patient with the new situation is essential.
"The courage of overcoming fear and the pleasure of discovery" opens the doors to our growth. With the new experiences we gain, we see the limits of what we can do and take a step toward self-discovery. In other words, our comfort zone expands over time as we add new actions, experiences, and thoughts to our lives. People who manage to move out of this zone usually move towards development in life and reaching their true potential.
On the other hand, the comfort zone, however safe it may seem, can destroy the price we pay. Although comfort, convenience, and monotony may seem like a pleasant order at first, over time, "the idea of being trapped in this situation" causes individuals to fear change, and this feeling makes people unhappy.
CHOICES AND COSTS...
Our choices shape our lives and the price we pay for them. Even though our minds always want to lead us to what is safe, there is a price to pay for being in that space. We pay the cost of not being able to get out of unhealthy relationships and not being able to improve ourselves. But when our fear of change is more potent than these feelings, we get stuck in what we call the comfort zone, which, contrary to its name, is uncomfortable and often makes us unhappy.
ELECTIONS AND COSTS...
Our choices shape our lives and the price we pay for them. Even though our minds always want to lead us to what is safe, there is a price to pay for being in that space. We pay the cost of not being able to get out of unhealthy relationships and not being able to improve ourselves. But when our fear of change is more potent than these feelings, we get stuck in what we call the comfort zone, which, contrary to its name, is uncomfortable and often makes us unhappy.
CHANGING THE SHELL...
The story of lobsters changing their shells is a good example of this. As lobsters grow inside their shells, they begin to outgrow the shell. Trapped inside the shell, the lobster is in intense pain. Eventually, to protect itself from other dangerous creatures in the sea, it hides under a rock, where it gets rid of its shell and starts producing shells again. After a while, when this shell becomes too narrow and cramped for him, he removes it behind a rock similarly and creates a new shell.
The lobster grows and develops thanks to its desire to get rid of its shell, and each time it changes shells, it grows a little bigger. It would never have grown if it had not been uncomfortable with its shell if it had never changed its shell despite all its troubles. His discomfort with his shell became his trigger for change.
OPENNESS TO EXPERIMENTATION…
Undeniably, "being open to experience" affects our entire decision-making system in our life journey. In every situation where we do not dare to change and step into the unknown, we experience the same cycles; we end our journey without taking risks and feeling excited."Setting goals and taking steps towards them" makes us grow and increases the pleasure we get from life. It's all about overcoming the fear field and taking that first step.
